As we were finishing seminary (Spring 2008), we knew we wanted to start a family as soon as our jobs began. I really thought, despite some fears, that we would be able to conceive right away. So, for 6 months we tried and realized it would be difficult due to my irregular cycles. Then, my sister referred me to her doctor, not a specialist, but an OB in Montgomery.
First OB Meeting
On my first visit (December 08), I was expecting an exam and the usual, but this doctor was different. He spent 10-15 minutes just trying to get to know who Jason and I were and of course the doctor detail of how long we’d been trying. Then, he walked me through his usual “fertility workup” to see what might be wrong if anything. Next, the best thing that he could have done he did. He asked if he could pray with me. (I had known he was a Christian since he attended the same church as my family.) In his prayer (which I cried most of the way through), he acknowledged God as CREATOR and THE Giver of Life. What a precious reminder that I needed in the midst of my initial discouragement! I was grateful and humbled. I had already formed a mindset of “fix me doctor”. This made me realize that I was NOT relying on the only One who can bring a little one into this world. The doctor also prayed that he would be used as God’s instrument…Wow! It wasn’t even a doctor who could “fix me”! It would be the hand of God to guide every little part of this journey!
Meds
After learning of my irregularity, he suggested we try Clomid to regulate my cycle to ensure ovulation. He prescribed 5 months (I think). Thankfully, I didn’t have any terrible reactions to it, as some people had warned. It did regulate me, but for those 5 months, periods came and went.
The doctor wanted to do a couple of other tests that summer, but scheduling them became hard since Jason and I were moving to Knoxville during that time.
On top of all of that, Jason had had chronic neck pain nearly the entire year that kept worsening. He also ended up having a neck fusion in June 2009. So, with that, plus the stress of moving to a new place, becoming first time home owners, and new jobs, we just put off the other tests until we got settled in Knoxville.
New Place, New Doctor
After we settled into our home, began our jobs/school, and made new friends and coworkers, I began asking around about doctors. A coworker of mine and my sister-in-law recommended a fertility specialist they’d known friends to use before. So, I called right away after hearing such neat reviews on this doctor. I first went to him in September 2009. I can’t say that on our first visit he prayed with me, but he did have a clear plan and was very reassuring in his expertise. He also wanted to run some tests (similar to what my last doctor was planning to do).
Tests
First up was Jason…everything came back just fine there.
Then, blood work for me testing lots of different things.
Next, was my biggie. In November, he did a laparoscopy to “search and find” what was going on inside. It’s a surgery in which a tiny camera can go in through a tiny incision by the belly button. He found level 2 (out of 4) endometriosis. While I was unconscious, he was able to go ahead and clear that out. Not only did he do this, but he (get this) widened my cervix and did a dye test on my tubes. Quite a productive surgery right?
Well, on the tube test, one tube wasn’t taking the dye (aka—closed); however, he said that sometimes that happens when the body is asleep. Guess we don’t try to conceive in our sleep! ☺
So, he scheduled me in January for an HSG (a dye test done through a catheter while awake). I dreaded that one, but by God’s grace, it was fine and results were good—my tubes were awake and open.
So, last, due to low hormone levels showing up in my bloodwork, he put be back on a low dose of Clomid. So, I was on that for January and February.
Lesson from Jason
At some point during my lowest weeks, Jason stopped me as I was telling out story to a friend. It had begun to come out of my mouth (without me really realizing it) that I thought I was being punished or something. I guess that stems from my invented legalism (not learned from my upbringing). He explained to me how God does NOT withhold GOOD from his children! He WANTS us to be happy and full of joy. He wants us to procreate! The best thing he said to me was, “God is on our side!” (I’m crying again as I remember this teaching moment.) It drew me to go to Him with an open and honest heart in prayer. It also made me fall more in love with the gift I have in my husband! Boy do I see why God gave me Jason!
February 2010
After 3 months post-surgery having 3 cycles, the nurse called and said for March, they would start me on a higher dose of Clomid and talk to me about getting an IUI if Jason and I were interested. (An IUI=Intrauterine Insemination—just helps the little guys get there.) Well, not only did I not want extra hormones—this time it was really getting to my moods along with feeling pretty low already about our lack of pregnancy, but the IUI would cost a good deal and was not covered by insurance.
But then, day 29 rolled around, day 30, day 31, day 32…I talked to my sister who was begging me to take a pregnancy test, but I was hesitant. It was almost going to be easier to start my cycle than to see a “Not Pregnant” sign again. But, by day 33, unbeknownst to Jason, I did it that morning. Almost immediately that digital Clear Blue test said “PREGNANT” and I couldn’t believe it. I ran to where Jason was and showed it to him. Both of us were in shock! That was one of the greatest feelings I’ve had—seeing those words and enjoying the surprise with Jason!
Well, the rest is what many people go through—doubt until you see a doctor, then fear until there’s an ultrasound, wondering when to tell people since I’m being treated as “high risk” at this fertility center, etc. So, now, two ultrasounds and a full trimester later, we are telling everyone with joy, humbled that the Creator is using us as his instruments to bring a child into the world! We will trust in the Giver of Life as this baby grows and await November 2010 to meet him or her.
Praise God from whom ALL blessings flow!!!
